This post is something I took a long time to write. So many people who try to persuade me not to travel, saying that “it’s dangerous”, that terrible thing will happen to me, and to be honest, the news and social media don’t help. All too often people, at least in most cases publicized, Women, are beaten, robbed and sadly killed in countries around the world. There are also places where police and other authorities refuse to admit to any wrongdoing, or that crimes even occur. This is a long-winded way to say that the subject of today’s post can be difficult for some to hear about, but we must discuss these events and make sure that people know about them not just to warn them, but to ensure that the people who commit these crimes are held accountable. I have chosen to name the victims, but not the attacker, because they do not deserve any attention. So, let’s get into it.

Let’s start a little lighter with a list of common scams;

The Broken Taxi Meter, The Overbooked Or Closed Hotel, Free ANYTHING, Spills On Your Clothing, Fake Police Officers, The Attraction Is Closed, Friendly ATM Helper, Injured or Child Beggars, Group Photo Offer, Fake Wi-Fi Hubs, Fake Bus/Train/Plane Tickets, Gemstone Or Carpet Deals, Shell games, Rental damage scam, Fake petition, Drug Deals gone wrong and my favourite, the overly flirtatious woman (sorry guys, women are usually more suspicious of anyone who flirts with us!)

Many of these are easy enough to avoid. Check the information with accommodation, check the hours of an attraction, get your tickets in advance, take photos when you pick up your rental, don’t sign any petitions and remember nothing in life is free.

But there are some things that could be harder, like drugging of drinks or food, people breaking into your accommodation, don’t use public or even hotel wi-fi to bank if you don’t need to, don’t buy stuff from the street vendors who claim they’re real diamonds, don’t buy drugs abroad.

And as far as the flirtation one goes, be suspicious, if you’re suddenly getting hit on left and right, either the person may be trying to rob you, they may be working. Think about that one for a minute, or maybe they do think you’re cute. I would still be cautious with that one, though I did grow up hearing about organs being harvested and sold so maybe its just residual fear from that. Who knows.

Moving on one we heard more about recently; Attacks.

You can be attacked anywhere. I remember a while back there was some ‘challenge’ that you were supposed to punch someone in the head randomly, which killed a few if I remember correctly.

The best way to avoid it is the same way you do at home; know the areas you’re visiting and don’t walk in dark areas at night.

If you can walk with others, preferably people you know, in well-lit areas. If you can, send others your location or use an app that will text or message a chosen person if you don’t check-in or get home within a set amount of time.

When I went to Cuba the second time, we went to Cayo Santa Maria, which is about 3 hours away from the Santa Clara airport, so we arrived at around midnight. It was dark, to say the least, and being from the city, there was NO WAY I was walking down a barely lit path to some far-off room, with bushes and hiding places everywhere. The girl helping with check-in did her best not to roll her eyes, but I could read her face like a damn book, she was annoyed but helped us anyway, which I appreciated, and thanked her quite e few times.

That was also the same trip I was harassed by a male employee who kept asking if I was single, but we’ll get into that a bit later.

One of the places we’ve heard about attacks in most recently is in the Dominican Republic. They had what seems like two dozen attacks over a few weeks, as well as hundreds getting sick at resorts and other issues as well. It was also around this time that CTV, one of Canada’s largest news networks aired a W5 (Investigative show) episode about the DR, more specifically, about the child prostitution in the town of Sousa, about 30 minutes by car from the tourist hub Puerto Plata. Now Prostitution is Legal, CHILD Prostitution is not, and many of these minors are from the other side of the island, Haiti.

I’ll link the written news story below, and the video though I’m not sure if it’s available everywhere or for how long it’ll stay up for, but it’s worth a watch if you can get it, and it’s relatively short at around 25 minutes, so it’s not a massive investment in time.

This one may be a bit heavy, so I’ll keep it short, Kidnappings

There have been so many movies about kidnappings. There are even memes from scenes in one of the movies series about a poor girl who can’t seem to catch a break and keeps getting abducted, but that’s a whole other subject.

Most commonly the people abducted are, again, women at about 80% as well as children (many being runaway teens). They are often abducted and are trafficked. The human trafficking networks around the world is estimated to be at over 21 million people and generates an estimated 32 Billion dollars a year. Most of whom are forced into prostitution and sex work, with a smaller percentage in forced labour, to put that number in context, at least a little bit, between 1525 and 1866, approximately 12.5 million people were taken from the African continent as slaves to the “Developed” world.

Most women I know are always highly aware of our surroundings, it is drilled into us as kids, and we use the skills all the time. Everyone has different techniques on how to observe those around you. It takes practice, so ask the women in your life what they do and practice before you leave, so you’ll have a better idea of how to see everything going on around you and not be noticed as much. As someone who’s been followed for blocks more than once, I promise even if you never use them, which I hope you won’t need to, they can help you if ever you feel like someone’s been following you too long.

So how do you stay safe? Avoiding being kidnapped can be hard because depending on the situation, you may not be aware it’s happening since it’s not like what we see in films and TV. These people are frighteningly good at what they do, often drugging their unsuspecting victims.

There was even a suspected human trafficker approaching women here in Montreal recently, and with the help of social media, we seem to have scared them off, at least for now, and we took to warning each other about the guys approaching women on the metro and into buildings.

My advice on this one is mostly the same, be aware of your surroundings, tell people where you’re going and for how long, schedule check-ins, don’t go out at night alone, take precautions about what you’re doing and don’t accept drink from anyone you don’t know, and if you can get them, maybe consider getting the drug test strips if you’re really worried.

Ok so, the heaviest one and one most people fear is out of the way, but it’s not all sunshine and rainbows from here, I’m sorry to tell you. Next on our list is Assault.

Assaults can come in many different categories, but most fall under verbal, physical and sexual.

While verbal assault may start out as a shouting match, it can quickly turn into a fistfight.

While it may seem easy enough, avoiding assaults can be difficult, many people are assaulted for so reason, some are at the wrong place at the wrong time, while others are targeted for one reason or another.

As for sexual assaults, it can literally happen anywhere. I was sexually assaulted in the Vatican while waiting in line to go to the Sistine Chapel when I was 16. Some man behind me thought it was ok to grab my ass, unfortunately for him; I keep my nails long.

Sexual assault can also be much more violent than what I’ve experienced, and the best way to avoid it is challenging to say because it happens so often, and reporting it doesn’t always work as for some strange reason people. Usually, women, are still being asked what they were wearing, how much they had to drink, and are they sure they’re not just changing their minds after the fact. Some countries will even arrest women because they had sex outside of marriage, even if they were assaulted.

So, stay vigilant, don’t go getting into fights, don’t sexually assault someone, report assaults if you can or feel safe to, PLEASE, only if you feel safe.

Our last but possibly most important subject; Harassment

After all the other things that have been discussed already, Harassment may seem like the least of your worries, but I would argue it should probably be top of the list.

It may seem like I’m shitting on men a bit, but these are simply the facts, women are harassed by men, so often most of us don’t even react anymore.

The constant harassment in person and online over generations and quite likely centuries have caused us to develop a thick skin to the ALWAYS UNWANTED catcalls, ass and breast grabs (which are assault in many places) and the swears and other abuse that go along with our usually gentle decline, because we don’t want to be murdered.

Quick side note, the “A mans worst fear is a woman will reject him, a woman’s worst fear is a man will kill her” quote is very much accurate, at least from a woman’s side. Learn to take no as an answer, guys. Please.

Anyway, back to harassment, there is really no way to avoid it, I’ve tried. Covered up, mostly covered, in baiting suits, some asshole willing to voice their unrequired and unwanted commentary, so my best advice here is to tell the people in your life to stop doing it and maybe that will stop it, but I have very little hope here.

So, going back to my original point, the reason I think harassment is one of the top problems is because this is usually the starting point. Harassment is often where it all begins, and it goes downhill from there when the harasser, abuser, asshole, whatever you want to call them, don’t get their way or get put in their place.

Before I go, if you want to hear first-hand experiences, you can search and get far too many results on YouTube & multiple websites, because as hard as I tried, this post barely scratches the surface of all the things to watch out for.